I wouldn’t call myself a pro at being a mom. I have only been at this “job” now for about six years going on seven. I have been incredibly blessed because my oldest has been amazing. She slept through the night as an infant, has always eaten very well, never cried much, is always eager to be a big helper, I mean she is utterly awesome at this. (I of course say all of this without any bias) With a second one on the way, however, I will admit that I am a bit nervous. Well, I’m downright scared. Now I will be responsible for two little people and the kind of humans they will turn out to be. It’s overwhelming.
In this parenting process I don’t claim to know how others feel but I can safely assume that a lot of us are on the same page when it comes to raising our children. We want them to learn, grow, and overall be fantastic, successful individuals. Along the way we question ourselves. Are we doing this right? How should I discipline? Will they hate me when they’re older?
So I thought I would jot down a few of my own personal parenting/mom truths. Please feel free to let me know if you agree/disagree or if I’ve forgotten anything. :)
- Mom truth number one: I don’t know everything. Yes, I know. I started off with a shocker. Though I claim to know it all..when you sneak out of bed, when you are frightened, when you are apprehensive, when you are doing something you shouldn’t be doing..The real truth is that I actually don’t know everything. I am no where near a super genius and when you ask me about rainbows and how they appear in the sky not only do I rely on past education but I also use my trusty friend Google to aid in my explanations. When you decide to question the real or falseness of dinosaurs, yes, it’s Google that helps me through. I am not ashamed to admit this. In the same insistence do not question my ability to tell when you are lying to me. As a mother I am able to detect, observe, and rationalize quicker. It comes with the job.
- Mom truth number two: If I could take away every ache, pain, or broken heart. I would. I would consume all of the anger and sadness so that all you are left with are happy thoughts. Is this beneficial to your growth as a person, probably not, but when you are overcome with sadness, feeling sick, afraid, or anything of the sort, it devastates me. I am left feeling helpless and vulnerable right alongside you. All I can do is offer up hugs, love, kisses, and all the advice Google and I can come up with. At the end of the day going through these obstacles in life will make you such a strong person. I would never want to rob you of those life lessons. Just remember that when you hurt, I hurt.
- Mom truth number three: When it comes to discipline I am not a fan. You might think that in the moment I am a monster. A selfish, evil parent, who just doesn’t get you. The truth is I hate it. I hate having to tell you no, and I hate having to scold you when you do something you shouldn’t do. When you color on the walls I agreed that I wouldn’t stifle your creative genius, but when you colored on the walls with my eyeliner, well, that was a different story. When you try to push buttons and see how much you can get away with I only scold you because if you don’t respect me or any authority figure, well, you’ll end up not respecting yourself. No, you are not allowed to scream and yell at me or anyone for that matter because that is not how we act. Those times I’ve had to put you in the corner were heart breaking but they are teaching you that in life there are consequences whether we like that or not. I hate having to be the bad cop. I’d much rather be the good one who hands out rewards. Sometimes it doesn’t always shake out that way, and honestly, you will understand when you’re older.
- Mom truth number four: I love, love, love being your best friend. It means the world to me that out of all the countless little friends you’ve made at school at the end of the day you still choose me. I hope that is something that lasts a lifetime. I am your mom/parent first but I would like to maintain a bond with you that nothing could break. I am afraid that when those teenage years come I will no longer be your best buddy. I know how I was as a youngster, and even though I realize those angst-y teen feelings change and you’ll come around again I just want you to know that I will be a little sad. Also know that no matter what, at the beginning and end of each and every day, I will always love you. With all of my heart. Nothing will ever change that. Not anything you say, think, or do. Because for the rest of our lives you will be apart of me. I wish nothing but the best for you. I will always be your biggest fan. I will cheer you on and stand in your corner. I want you to be successful, happy, loved. I want you to reach your full potential and then find a little more to grab onto. My dreams for you are endless. Even at six I am so proud of you and I can not wait to witness the accomplishments in your life. You’re heart is big and your soul is kind. Thank you for blessing my life.
- Mom truth number five: I know that I can not shield you from everything. I can not tuck you away in a bubble. You will eventually have to make your own decisions and think for yourself. You’ll have to come up with your own ideas on how you want to live your life and I just hope that all of my decisions shape you into a wonderful person. I realize often that I will have to let you be your own person one day. It scares me. All I want to do is protect you. So when I come off as overbearing, or crazy, just know that it is all coming from a good place. I promise.
At the end of the day I am doing my best. A lot of this was aimed towards my little miss but the sentiments are the same for the little guy I am waiting to meet. I only want what’s best for them and I want them to know I will always love them.
What are your thoughts on parenting? Anything you’d like your kids to know?