In the wild.

“Oh, my wife’s a type one diabetic!”

My husband has said this phrase more times than I can truly count. He has come in contact with so many diabetics through work, or just being out and about, and it is so amazing. The problem is that I haven’t met a single one. Not in person anyway. All my interactions with diabetics has been strictly online. Which I won’t complain about because I have met some wonderful people through this outlet. I just wish I knew more in real life.

I had one friend in college who was a type one on an insulin pump. We became friends fast but while I was curious about how she managed this tedious disease she was dealing with that dreaded burn out and wanted absolutely nothing to do with diabetes and all that it entailed.

Other than that there aren’t many that I have come across and truthfully it can be a bit depressing sometimes.

This past weekend changed that for me. My brother in law was getting married and his beautiful new wife has a best friend who just so happens to be a type one diabetic. My husband found this out through conversation and just had to let me know. I wanted so badly to run over an ask her about it but I felt awkward. What if she didn’t want everyone to know. What if me walking up to her and asking made her feel self conscious. I kept thinking about how I would feel. Right when I had decided that maybe it wouldn’t be the best thing to do I see her making her way towards me. She sat right down and just started chatting away with me about insulin pumps, and CGM’s. It was the coolest thing.

I introduced her to the Dexcom system and spoke with her about why I loved the Omnipod. She talked about the pros and cons of being on Medtronic. We discussed how we’ve gone about teaching our little ones about this disease and just the day to day of living with diabetes. Being able to connect with someone about something so personal was the best feeling in the world. It makes me want to meet my online diabetic friends even more now. There is only so much my husband gets, but to be able to say so much with only a few words and have the other person instantly know what I mean, well, it’s awesome.

I’m not expecting the two of us to be life long buddies. (Though we are friends on Facebook now) It was just so nice being able to talk with someone else about this whole other side of me and have them understand completely. It was priceless.


On the baby front everything is continuing to go smoothly. Insulin resistance is real and it has hit hard. I am struggling a bit with it but as long as I keep on fighting I know I can overcome it.

I am currently 35 weeks and 5 days along. His growth scan from this morning weighs my little guy in at 7 pounds. I was shocked. He is in the 94th percentile and while my diabetic specialist doesn’t seem too concerned I can’t help but worry. There is so much up in the air at the moment that I am left feeling very overwhelmed.

They don’t think I will make it past 37 weeks and I am okay with that. We are discussing C-sections and what not. My doctor is still leaning towards a normal delivery and what not so I’ll just keep my fingers crossed.

Other than that my maternity leave starts this weekend. I have my last shift tomorrow and then it’s “relaxing” time. Easier said than done though. Every time I think I have everything in order I find something else to add to my list. I can’t help it. I like to be ahead of the game when I can be.

How are all my other pregnant mamas out there? Let me know how things are going in your neck of the woods. And don’t forget to keep wearing those smiles. :)

Freaky Friday.

Here’s a Friday Fives coming at you this morning. Enjoy!

  1. Tomorrow I will be 33 weeks along in this pregnancy. I see my team of doctors every Monday and Thursday. The non-stress tests are fun because I get to listen to my little guys heartbeat and you can hear whenever he moves, too. The comfy leather couches in the office aren’t bad either. Makes me want a couple of leather loungers for the house. They would have made relaxing during this pregnancy a bit easier, I think. Thursday is ultrasound day and that is even better because I actually get to see my chubby little guy on screen. Yesterday was a blast. He was so sleepy and not wanting to cooperate with the ultrasound tech so she gave him a little wake up call with this buzzer thing she placed on my belly. All of a sudden he jolts up and punches me right in the stomach. (Could you blame him?) Then you could see him start turning, and stretching. He started smacking his lips together and yawning. It was precious. Here’s a picture.

    Pouting his lips and yawning.

  2. I started getting my hospital bag together. I have clothes for me and baby. Two outfits for him, newborn and 0-3 sizes, just because I don’t know how much he will be weighing at birth. The only things I need now are some travel sized toiletries and a few things that I use daily so I can’t add them just yet. I’m feeling very accomplished though. I am hoping to get to do the maternity, labor and delivery, tour soon. We went Wednesday but weren’t able to find anyone who could show us around. I was bummed but we’ll try again this Wednesday. It’s not super important but I would like to know where to go and what the rooms will look like.
  3. The months are starting to get hectic. I have loads of appointments but most importantly my brother in law is getting married in a few weeks. There is a lot of planning on every ones part to get stuff done and situated for the big day. Especially since my husband is the best man and the little one gets to be one of the flower girls. Next month is my daughters seventh birthday. I am feeling slightly stressed out about it because I will be having a baby and trying to plan some epic festivities for her and some of her friends. Then the holidays and all the planning that those entail. I am just so ready for a vacation. :)
  4. With pregnancy comes a lot of symptoms. My number one annoyance is the back pain. I started using a maternity belt though and I have to say it has helped out a ton so far. I was iffy about it at first. Tried it a few times here and there but then finally buckled down and gave it a real go and it has just been great. I worked without it the other day and could totally feel a difference. I would recommend it to any pregnant mama who is having to stand a lot. Or move around a ton. Really I would say just try it even if you are at home. I got mine from Babies R Us and it was around thirty dollars. Not bad for what it has done for me.
  5. As far as my diabetes goes everything is great. I haven’t needed to make any adjustments on insulin dosages. Though my specialist warns that towards the end of this pregnancy, so very soon here, I might need to make a few changes here and there. She’s set up blood work for me because she is curious as to what my A1c will be. My last one was in the mid sixes, in February, and that was because I had just started the pump. She thinks I’ll be in the fives. At first she wasn’t concerned with checking my A1c because the daily numbers gave her a better picture of my diabetes management but since I am doing so well she thought I’d like to know where I was in that aspect. She’s right. Someone had posted somewhere that your A1c is kind of like a report card. I’m curious to see what it could be.
  6. BONUS: I forgot to mention that we are also getting ready for Halloween around here. Going to head out and get decorations soon. I already bought my daughter her costume. She will be going as Elsa. Like most little girls this season I’m sure. I expect to be enveloped in a sea of blue ice queens come Halloween night. My husband and I hunted store to store to find one and finally did. They have been sold out for quite some time now. I was so happy because I know it’s what she really wanted. Her expression was priceless when we showed her. I wish we would have gotten it on camera.

I hope October is treating you well.

Many thanks for stopping by and as always..Don’t forget to smile.

Making my lists..

…and checking them twice.

No, it’s not Christmas. Though that is right around the corner. It’s getting-everything-ready-for-baby time. Because no matter how prepared you think you are, sometimes, something ends up jumping out to startle you. Well, not this time. I plan to be one step ahead of the game whenever possible.

For example, not only are all of the little guys things put together, organized, and set up, I am also pre-registered at the hospital I will be delivering at. I will be touring the facility, hopefully, sometime this week. AND I am going to be completely stocked up on my diabetic supplies for a few months. I can’t imagine remembering to call about supplies with an adorable little baby in my arms.

Another issue I am addressing. To hospital bag or not to..hospital bag?

I had gone back and forth on whether or not I would actually pack one this time around. When I had my daughter it was in the middle of the night/early morning and I had just gotten out of the shower. I felt the excruciating pains of contractions and frantically woke my husband up. We were both exhausted and not very clear headed. I remember chucking a bag in his general direction and screaming at him to throw stuff in it. I feel like, literally, whatever was in front of us at that moment in time was put into it.

(You’d think with being diabetic I would have been way more prepared!)

Once we arrived at the hospital and were all set up we realized upon inspection of said bag that we had forgotten most everything we really wanted to bring. My husband had to drive all the way back to the house to get clothes for me and baby girl, my make up, hairbrush, etc. The only thing we had managed to grab was our phones and chargers. This time around I wanted to do things a little differently. Looking back I can remember thinking, boy, I wish I had remembered to pack this or that. Little things that would have made my stay at the hospital slightly more cozier. (I kicked  myself for not packing a bag early on in that pregnancy. I ended up being very stressed out!) So, recently, I took to a few forums that I frequent and asked them if they were going to be packing bags. With an overwhelming yes every single one of them sent me lists upon lists of what they would be bringing with them.

I picked and prodded those lists and came up with one of my own. Pictured above this post was a glimpse of what I will be packing. Just the essentials really. One mom described packing my hospital bag as, “things you’d take with you on a mini vacation!” In the next week or so I plan on heading out to grab some travel sized things to take with me. Hopefully this time around everything in my bag will be things I actually need.

For you mamas out there:

How important is it to you that you have a bag packed and ready to go?

What will be, or was, inside of yours?

Fall is here.

My calendar tells me that today is the first day of Fall, Autumn, or pumpkin spice season. (Whatever you want to call it) This makes me so happy. I’m a California girl so the weather, if you haven’t been out that way, is usually the same. Gorgeous. NO complaints. When I moved to Ohio oh so many years ago I was introduced to actual seasons though. It was an amazing discovery. Summer feels like hell, winter is actually cold and snowy, Spring is lovely with all the bright pinks and purples, and Fall, well, Fall is the best season of all. With the leaves changing, the pumpkins, the cooler weather, the hoodies and bonfires. It’s just such a beautiful time of year for me.

I love this time of year so much it wasn’t a surprise that my daughter was born in November. Now, I get to welcome another November baby into my life and it is just so exciting. All the things that I love nestled under one orange and red blanket of comfy goodness. :)

What are you most excited about when it comes to this time of year?


Baby Updates: Currently I am 31 weeks and 3 days. My due date is literally around the corner. My pregnancy calendar tells me that I have exactly sixty days until I get to meet my little guy. In all honesty it will be sooner than that. The doctor would like to induce me by 39 weeks. (Though I am hoping he comes on his own at 37 weeks like his sister did. Which means I could be snuggling him in roughly six weeks!)

Whenever he decides to make his entrance into this world we will all be waiting. I feel very prepared this time around. Car seat is hooked up and ready to go. Stroller is put together and his bed is ready to keep him cozy. I have plenty of clothes to start him off and even a few toys, too. The only things I have left on my check list is tour the birthing facility sometime this next month, get maternity photos done in a week or so, pack my hospital bag, and lastly clean the heck out of this house.

Nesting has hit harder than ever.

I’m not sure if the cleaning will actually get done how/when I want it to though since the twice a week appointments have started. Mondays I see my high risk OB for my fetal non-stress tests. There they will check my blood pressure, weight, and make sure everything is on track with his heart and my health. Thursdays I see my diabetic specialist and they will be checking my blood glucose levels and making sure they continue to stay in range. They will also be doing growth scans to make sure baby boy isn’t getting too big. We need him to be just right. I have these appointments already pre-scheduled out through the end of October.

All I need to do is show up. Easy, right? :)

A few complaints: This constant swelling makes it so that I can barely move. It makes life a little difficult. The exhaustion has me beyond grumpy some days. I had no idea I could go to bed tired and wake up even more drained. If you didn’t think that was possible either I’m here to tell you it is. Another not so fun factor is the back pain. I am in excruciating pain most days. Walking up and down the stairs has become dreadful. It’s to the point where I wont even go up there unless I really have to. The OB suggested a maternity belt. They sell them at target and most motherhood maternity stores. She says that this should fix things because it shifts your belly/uterus up and changes your overall center of gravity. Because my little guy is sitting so low it’s causing most of the issues. She says that if this doesn’t help, considering I still have quite a few weeks to go, then she would suggest I take an early leave from work until after baby is born.

On the plus side, I get to see my baby boy on the ultra sound every week until his arrival which is a blessing. Also his movements have gotten so much stronger. His karate chops wake me up some nights. I can’t be upset about that though. They actually make me giggle.

Basically I’m just trying to relax as much as I can and enjoy these final months of pregnancy.Yes, that is easier said than done. :)

Oh, Monday.

Everyone seems to really despise Monday. I suppose it’s because that’s normally when everyone heads back to work after their relaxing weekend. I, on the other hand, rather enjoy Monday. I work all weekend, about eight plus hours a day, sometimes less, so when Monday finally rolls around I look at it as MY weekend. I don’t have to put my uniform on or see that big red target symbol until Friday evening and I am totally okay with that. Ha. It’s just a funny backwards thing that I realized.

How was your weekend by the way?

I worked Friday, was off Saturday, and then was back at it Sunday. Saturday was my baby shower thrown by my sisters in law. It was amazing and so much fun. The theme was whales and waves and I wasn’t disappointed. The food was delicious, the decorations were adorable, the games had me laughing so much, and the company was awesome. Little man is so blessed to have so many people in his life who already love and adore him. He received quite a few gifts so we really only need a few items and we’ll be all set for his arrival.

Baby update: I am 30 weeks 2 days along and feeling great. I’m exhausted, still swollen, and that heartburn is a beast. Other than that the blood sugar levels have been amazingly on point and I am smooth sailing from here on out. According to my high risk doctor. He complimented me for being well managed and under control. Which means so much to me because this disease can have a mind of it’s own. Sometimes I want to throw in the towel and say forget you too diabetes but I know that I can’t. Not while little guy is still growing. I’ll be starting two visits a week with my High risk OB and diabetic specialist next week. Which tells me that we are in the home stretch. I am so close to the finish line I could taste it. I will be filling paperwork out for maternity leave here soon. The car seat is on it’s way. The house is fairly organized now. We’re basically just waiting. The worst game ever.

I am thankful that everything continues to go well.

It’s not without a lot of hard work and stressing over every little detail. I hate for it to sound like it’s such a breeze because it’s definitely not. So when I hear that I am doing a great job I really take it to heart. I have high blood sugars here and there. Sometimes I eat junk food. The point is that I never give up and I stay on top of everything. I speak with other diabetic women trying to conceive and I encourage them to start families if that’s what they really want. Because it’s not impossible. Every pregnancy is different, just like every diabetic is different. I think these are important facts to keep in mind when talking with one another. I was recently on a diabetic/pregnancy forum where everyone was bashing one another. There were sides and clicks being started. Women who were having “smooth” pregnancies and others who might be struggling some. They were being very discouraging towards each other and it broke my heart.

I say, encourage, support, and be there. No matter what. That’s how we get through obstacles no matter the size.

Enough about that though. Let’s get to the fun stuff…pictures!

The only Mom and Dad in the pack. :)

30 weeks!

Diaper cake.

Party favors.

Little mans bed.

Just me :)

 

 

Enjoying this moment.

That’s him. My sweet little guy.

Only eighty days until I get to hold him in my arms and snuggle him up. The time is moving so fast and yet still so slow. Everyone here is anxious for him to be born. My daughter especially. She has so many plans for the two of them. What cartoons she’ll introduce him to. The lessons she wants to teach him. Her heart is filled with so much love for him and they’ve never even met. It’s such a magical, beautiful thing to witness. She kisses my tummy and tells her little brother that she can’t wait to give him hugs. She says she’s waiting patiently for him and that she’ll be here when he decides it’s time to come out.

I love it. It makes my heart melt. At first my husband and I were worried because for so long now she’s been the only one. The only grandchild, the only little one, the only niece. She hasn’t had to “compete” with anyone for love and attention. She got it all. I was concerned that she’d feel left out, abandoned maybe, and I think she did at first. Then I explained to her all the cool things older siblings get to do. My husband, being the oldest, really glamorized the whole thing. Soon after she was team baby all the way. Now she’s counting down the days right along with me. It’s precious.

The other day she asked if she was going to have more brothers and sisters one day. Something my husband and I have discussed but never with her. Our thoughts were that after this little peanut I would not be having any more children. It was a difficult decision to come to but my husband and I agreed that my health and wellness played a huge role in whether more children would be an option. As I get older my risk for complications becomes greater, especially with diabetes on board. Living with this disease doesn’t get easier by any means. I examined the pros and cons of having another baby one day and came to the conclusion that not only could I be potentially putting myself in danger, I’d be putting a little life in danger, too.

I realized that I have so much to be thankful for, why risk losing what I have now. I have spoken with quite a few diabetic mommies who feel the way that I do. It’s nice to know that I am not alone in this decision. Not that I am against someone who wants to have lots of babies. I just know my body. How I re-cooperate. Only I know how this pregnancy has treated me and I am so worn down already. I don’t think I could handle going through another one. Not just physically, but emotionally, too. I lay awake all night stressing about blood sugars, what I ate, or didn’t eat. If he’s growing properly in there. If a complication were to arise would it be my fault? All these things run through my head and it’s draining.

This decision is the main reason why I am trying to enjoy this pregnancy as much as I can and everything it entails. The kicks and barrel rolls, the ultrasounds, even the heartburn. Because it’s going to be my last.

So when my daughter looked up at me with an eagerness to hear my answer I just smiled and said that two was enough for me. She hugged on me real tight and smiled this big grin and said, yeah, two is plenty. Plus, you still have to take care of daddy. :)

For any of you pregnant and diabetic mommies out there..what are your thoughts on this topic?

Mom Truths.

SuperMom

I wouldn’t call myself a pro at being a mom. I have only been at this “job” now for about six years going on seven. I have been incredibly blessed because my oldest has been amazing. She slept through the night as an infant, has always eaten very well, never cried much, is always eager to be a big helper, I mean she is utterly awesome at this. (I of course say all of this without any bias) With a second one on the way, however, I will admit that I am a bit nervous. Well, I’m downright scared. Now I will be responsible for two little people and the kind of humans they will turn out to be. It’s overwhelming.

In this parenting process I don’t claim to know how others feel but I can safely assume that a lot of us are on the same page when it comes to raising our children. We want them to learn, grow, and overall be fantastic, successful individuals. Along the way we question ourselves. Are we doing this right? How should I discipline? Will they hate me when they’re older?

So I thought I would jot down a few of my own personal parenting/mom truths. Please feel free to let me know if you agree/disagree or if I’ve forgotten anything. :)

  • Mom truth number one: I don’t know everything. Yes, I know. I started off with a shocker. Though I claim to know it all..when you sneak out of bed, when you are frightened, when you are apprehensive, when you are doing something you shouldn’t be doing..The real truth is that I actually don’t know everything. I am no where near a super genius and when you ask me about rainbows and how they appear in the sky not only do I rely on past education but I also use my trusty friend Google to aid in my explanations. When you decide to question the real or falseness of dinosaurs, yes, it’s Google that helps me through. I am not ashamed to admit this. In the same insistence do not question my ability to tell when you are lying to me. As a mother I am able to detect, observe, and rationalize quicker. It comes with the job.
  • Mom truth number two: If I could take away every ache, pain, or broken heart. I would. I would consume all of the anger and sadness so that all you are left with are happy thoughts. Is this beneficial to your growth as a person, probably not, but when you are overcome with sadness, feeling sick, afraid, or anything of the sort, it devastates me. I am left feeling helpless and vulnerable right alongside you. All I can do is offer up hugs, love, kisses, and all the advice Google and I can come up with. At the end of the day going through these obstacles in life will make you such a strong person. I would never want to rob you of those life lessons. Just remember that when you hurt, I hurt.
  • Mom truth number three: When it comes to discipline I am not a fan. You might think that in the moment I am a monster. A selfish, evil parent, who just doesn’t get you. The truth is I hate it. I hate having to tell you no, and I hate having to scold you when you do something you shouldn’t do. When you color on the walls I agreed that I wouldn’t stifle your creative genius, but when you colored on the walls with my eyeliner, well, that was a different story. When you try to push buttons and see how much you can get away with I only scold you because if you don’t respect me or any authority figure, well, you’ll end up not respecting yourself. No, you are not allowed to scream and yell at me or anyone for that matter because that is not how we act. Those times I’ve had to put you in the corner were heart breaking but they are teaching you that in life there are consequences whether we like that or not. I hate having to be the bad cop. I’d much rather be the good one who hands out rewards. Sometimes it doesn’t always shake out that way, and honestly, you will understand when you’re older.
  • Mom truth number four: I love, love, love being your best friend. It means the world to me that out of all the countless little friends you’ve made at school at the end of the day you still choose me. I hope that is something that lasts a lifetime. I am your mom/parent first but I would like to maintain a bond with you that nothing could break. I am afraid that when those teenage years come I will no longer be your best buddy. I know how I was as a youngster, and even though I realize those angst-y teen feelings change and you’ll come around again I just want you to know that I will be a little sad. Also know that no matter what, at the beginning and end of each and every day, I will always love you. With all of my heart. Nothing will ever change that. Not anything you say, think, or do. Because for the rest of our lives you will be apart of me. I wish nothing but the best for you. I will always be your biggest fan. I will cheer you on and stand in your corner. I want you to be successful, happy, loved. I want you to reach your full potential and then find a little more to grab onto. My dreams for you are endless. Even at six I am so proud of you and I can not wait to witness the accomplishments in your life. You’re heart is big and your soul is kind. Thank you for blessing my life.
  • Mom truth number five: I know that I can not shield you from everything. I can not tuck you away in a bubble. You will eventually have to make your own decisions and think for yourself. You’ll have to come up with your own ideas on how you want to live your life and I just hope that all of my decisions shape you into a wonderful person. I realize often that I will have to let you be your own person one day. It scares me. All I want to do is protect you. So when I come off as overbearing, or crazy, just know that it is all coming from a good place. I promise.

At the end of the day I am doing my best. A lot of this was aimed towards my little miss but the sentiments are the same for the little guy I am waiting to meet. I only want what’s best for them and I want them to know I will always love them. 

What are your thoughts on parenting? Anything you’d like your kids to know?